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A Dream and A Cough

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 10:34 PM
I'm so sorry for my absence!

God has presented me with some recent trials and great blessings lately.

Let's cover the trials first, shall we? I'd rather end on a happy note. ;)

In the beginning of October, I suddenly came down with a cough. I thought it was just a cold, which then we thought was Bronchitis or Walking Pneumonia. The cough was getting worse and sleepless nights became the norm. Then left rib began to shoot with pain every time I coughed. My parents suggested I visit the doctor. At the walk-in clinic, I was told that is was most likely Bronchitis, and I was prescribed a z-pack of Azithromycin. 

A day or two after beginning the medication I began having coughing fits that made it difficult to breathe; it was frightening and uncomfortable, but I just dealt with it. I finished the medication last Friday (a week ago now) and this past Tuesday I was driving home when I had my worst coughing fit. I was unable to get air into my lungs at all and it felt like I was going to throw up although I did not feel nauseas. (Keep in mind, vomiting is my greatest fear). Unsure of whether to pull over and puke or keep going, I just kept driving. 

I had the nagging feeling that not breathing during a coughing attack was not part of Bronchitis. I hopped online and typed in my symptoms. In the end, I self-diagnosed myself with Pertussis also known as Whooping Cough; an illness I had been vaccinated against as a child. At that point, I was past contagious and had already "killed" the bacteria with the medication. All sites I visited said all I could do was wait it out. There's no medication you can take to "cure" whooping cough, so waiting is what I shall do.

I've also had a lot of recent car trouble like getting my first flat tire (on a Friday) and driving to work and having my front tire fly off (on a Friday) and this Friday it appears that one of my spark plugs isn't happy. Fridays and my car don't get along. Poor thing...but hey! It's got 183,880+  miles on it now, so it's just getting good. ;)

This whole time, I've had so much praise for God. I've been able to look past the uncomfortable fits and the likely broken rib, and admire so many simple yet wonderful things; for example, the sunrise on the way to work. I feel like God is really working in my life despite these minor obstacles.

Onto the good news!


Something I made on Picmonkey.com while in a praise-y mood. :)
College is going well, but it certainly takes a lot of energy to keep up good grades. :P I even made my first friend outside of the people I knew before attending!

Also, I'm slowly learning how to speak Korean. :D I've been listening to the Pimsleur program on my 35 minute daily commute. It'll be more helpful to memorize the alphabet, which I'd like to work on this weekend... I also joined a multi-lanuage exchange social networking site called Lang-8. It's so awesome and I highly recommend it if you're trying to learn a second language. You can Skype with native speakers, edit their English writing skills, and in turn they will edit your written [insert language]. It's super cool. B) 

I've also started budgeting for my trip to Asia. My friend and I are open to going over there with a mission trip. We've got a couple years, so there's plenty of time get ideas. I'm so fueled by this! I don't know what God has for me over there, but I'm sure it'll be amazing.

Before I go, I want to mention that my blog has 1,500 page views now. Thank you so much! I really appreciate your guys' interest in my blog!

Have a wonderful night!

Blessings,

~Twyla




Eyes That Are Bigger Than My Stomach

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 10:48 PM
Good evening, everybody!

I'm playing catch up here, so please forgive me for not updating sooner.


College is going well, but after having the work load for three classes I don't foresee myself going full time. I work 20 hours a week at my job and do homework for 5-6 hours a day Monday - Friday. Plus, I have another class starting in November. I've also continued attending a Wednesday night youth group (as a small group leader) and a college age Bible study on Thursday nights.


As of two weeks ago, I decided I wanted to visit Korea and Japan for a month. The best part is I already have a travel buddy, Jen, who attends the same youth group and college as me!


The whole idea of this trip is really strange because I never planned on leaving the country after our 2 week trip to Australia in March/April this year, but my heart suddenly started aching for Asia. I keep wondering if the Lord has something He wants me to do while I'm over there. I have no idea what He's thinking.


Now I have added learning Korean and Japanese in the next two years in between school and work. I have a lot of budgeting and saving to do, but I feel like I'll be able to do it. :)


The Lord has given me so many new opportunities to meet new people too! He is so good.


Have a blessed night, you beautiful people!


Blessings,


~Twyla

This World Is Bigger Than We Think

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 1:48 PM
Typically, when I drive to work in the morning, I roll down my window (since my car lacks air conditioning) and blare my radio so I can hear it. At 7:15 AM, the last thing I want to do is think, and doing this is relaxing for me. This morning however, I kept my window up, turned off my radio, and prayed.

I couldn't even remember the last time I had a silent car, so the quite was refreshing as I spoke to the Lord. As I prayed, I found realizing how often I don't understand God's creation. Sure, He made the Earth, grass, trees, ect. but as I pondered further I kept coming to this state of awe. As I drove past perfect rows of corn and scattered farms, I was thinking how amazing God created everything around me. Just stop and think for a second about everything around you. Everything. It's crazy, isn't it? With all of Creation around me, I can't even fathom the idea that this world just appeared in a "big bang." 

Try to notice the little things that aren't really little things this week. You'd be surprised at the revelation of it all. :)

Enjoy my tree picture!

Blessings,

~Twyla

A New Chapter in Life's Story

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 4:10 PM
Due to the busy-ness of my summer I was unable to update my blog as regularly. I do hope to be more consistent this school year.

So today's post theme is about new beginnings. This year has been full of change, so I've had to learn a lot about flexibility and acceptance. I'm still learning a vast amount as God directs my life in directions I never anticipated.

This summer I worked my "last" year on camp staff at a local Cub Scout camp. I say last in quotes since many other members have said the same and come back anyways. It was the most unique summer I've worked in the 7 years (including volunteer years) that I've been there. I grew so close to everyone on staff and one of my fellow members, Jared, summed up the experience well by saying, "Why would I miss an opportunity to spend time with my extended family?" He's right. We're all one big, diverse family at camp. It's an experience that has help shape who I am today and I'm so thankful to the Lord for that opportunity. My season at camp has ended. It makes me really sad, but I know the Lord will take me to more great places in the future.

Two days after my summer job ended, I was let go from my office job. (I took a leave of absence during the summer, but I'm under the same employer at both jobs.) I can't say I didn't see it coming, but it was hard nonetheless. I worked there for the past 5 1/2 years and I became so close the the three ladies I worked that I consider them my "office aunts". They've nurtured me over the years as I learned how to drive, graduate from high school, pick up more responsibilities, and make decisions on my own. The Lord was looking out for me though. A new job opportunity had come on the horizon two days prior to being let go, and I was hired a week after being unemployed. I begin my new office job tomorrow!

After taking a year off of high school, I am finally ready for college. I've begun a new chapter in my life, like many of my peers, and I look forward to what the Lord will show me in this coming school year. After much prayer, I plan on attending the local community college in pursue of an Administrative Assistant diploma. I'm attending school part-time for the first semester to dip my toes in the water. It also works well with my new job schedule. So lately I've been busy taking care of all the loose ends before the semester starts on August 27th. :)

I can see God working in my life and it's such an incredible thing for me! I truly praise Him for His great works. It hasn't always been pleasant or comfortable, but coming out of that tunnel in the end is really refreshing. 

So, that's what is up with me. I hope you see God's blessings in your life every day and that you learn to walk by faith. Proverbs 16:9, "In his hear man plans his course, but God directs his steps."

In times of struggle, I hope you cling to Him. He is our rock! :) (Pslam 18:2). Please enjoy the typography I did on one of my photos! 

Blessings,

~Twyla

One of Those Weeks

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 1:27 PM
Have you ever had one of those weeks where you feel like the world was out to get you? I have. In fact, it happened to me all last week, but you know what? The Lord saw me and my fellow camp staff members through it. The feeling of overcoming the problems of the week outshone the negativity that happened.

It's hard to realize what lesson the Lord is teaching me when I'm in the problem itself, but when I finally come to the light at the end of the tunnel, I'm often elated to look back and think, "I did it. I persevered and the Lord has shown me endurance." :) He truly is a wonderful God.

I hope that if you're struggling through difficulties this week be it patience, depression, anger, forgiveness, work, ect. I pray that you too would focus on the Lord and know that from your trials you will learn many things. Including lessons you didn't intend to learn. ;)

Have an incredible week everybody!

Blessings,

~Twyla

Reality Slap

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 12:28 AM
I was just praying to God and telling Him about how poorly I've done in seeking out Him these last few weeks and how I've felt like a lukewarm Christian. :( He was listening, because I was suddenly compelled to read the next devotion in my copy of "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young. (I understand this is not to be treated like the Bible, but it certainly told me what I needed to hear.) The first sentence was like a reality slap and I truly praise God for accepting and forgiving me of all my faults. Here's the devotion:

May 9 (I don't mind reading it out of order;) -

"Don't be so hard on yourself. I can bring good even out of your mistakes. Your finite mind tends to look backward, longing to undo decisions you have come to regret. This is a waste of of time and energy, leading only to frustration. Instead of floundering in the past, release your mistakes to Me. Look to Me in trust, anticipating that My infinite creativity can weave both good and bad into lovely design.

Because you are human, you will continue to make mistakes. Thinking that you will continue to live an error-free life is symptomatic of pride. Your failures can be a source of blessing, humbling you and giving you empathy for other people in their weaknesses. Best of all, failure highlights your dependence on Me. I am able to bring beauty out of the morass of your mistakes. Trust Me, and watch to see what I will do."

She then provides two Scriptures references to tie into it:

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

"But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord. I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me." Micah 7:7

I hope you too would be encouraged. :)

God bless you all! Have a good night.

~Twyla

I Love You

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 7:57 PM
Last week I had been praying before bed like usual.

"Dear Lord, thank you for the wonderful day I had and the blessings you've given me..."

Then all of a sudden I interrupted my own prayer and breathed, "God, I love you. I love you." It dawned on me with sickening realization that I rarely expressed my love towards the Lord verbally. Every night I tell my family I love them and "I'll see ya tomorrow", but unintentionally excluded my Heavenly Father. When I finally said it last week I was overtaken with emotion and my heart swelled. I truly have an amazing God. :'3

On another note, I saw a photo on Tumblr that struck a chord with me. It said, "What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" Pretty shocking when you recall the previous night's prayer, isn't it?

Have a hugely blessed day! Laugh lots!

Blessings,

~Twyla

Fourteen Tissues and a Thousand Tears

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 12:28 AM

I just finished watching "The Passion of the Christ". The last time I watched it, it had just come out on video back in 2004--I was only eight years old. I remember crying when my family watched it, and I knew Jesus had died for our sins, but it wasn't until I watched it tonight that I fully understood, visually, what He had gone through for my sins--everyone's sins.


My heart ached for His suffering and tears streamed down my cheeks, a tissue box readily at hand. I was upset at the people who harassed Him, betrayed Him, lied about Him, crucified Him. Yet, He bore it all. He prayed for them as He hung up on the cross, He begged the Lord to forgive them. He loved them despite their unjust action. John 13:34 says, "A new commandment I give to you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so must you love one another." Matthew 5:43-48 Jesus says, "You have heard it said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."


Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice and too often we take it for granted. He loved us so much that He died a gruesome criminal's death in order to save us. 


I watched that movie for a reason: to remind myself of what the Lord endured to give me freedom and to remember what true love looks like. How I treasure what He's done.


Blessings,

~Twyla

Dead as a Doornail

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 1:30 PM
Oh my goodness! I had such a huge God moment yesterday! Let me explain:

I drive a black 1995 Chevrolet Cavalier with 174,000+ miles on it. I have a lot of affection for it having bought it as my first and only car at $300 as a fixer-upper. And let me tell you, it was a piece of work, but I loved it all the same.

It's been two years since my dad and brother fixed it up and I've haven't had any problems with it besides the recently replaced exhaust coil...at least until yesterday.

After work, I drove to Subway for supper. I paid for my meal and planned to eat in my car before heading to the library and Bible Study. I dove right into my chips and turned the key in the ignition for some heat. My radio flashed on and my dash lights blinked to life, but my engine was silent. After several failed attempts my car's engine refused to turn over. It was dead as a doornail. Sad day.

I whipped out my cell phone and first called my mom. No answer at home or on her cell phone. Next best idea: call my little brother who knows auto mechanics. Straight to the answering machine. Aw, bummer. And here I had hoped Nate could talk me through the problem while I popped the hood on my car. That was a no go. Hoping he was still at the office I worked at, I called my co-worker, Tom. Thankfully he answered, and I explained my problem to him. His initial thought was maybe the battery had died, but because all my lights were coming on that scratched that idea. Being unable to help me otherwise he wished me luck and I went back to munching my chips pitifully. It was forty-some degrees outside and had been raining steadily all day. Hoping to warm up my little car I turned the key to at least get the car heater working...or not. It only blew cool air because the engine was cold. I mentally slapped my forehead. 

In a last ditch effort I called my dad whom I thought was still out of state. Again, I hoped he could council me through it. After too many phone rings, he picked up and I breathed a sigh of relief saying, "Thank goodness you picked up!" "What's the problem?" he asked. Again I explained what had happened. After I got off the phone, I started texting Tom to let him know I was okay when he called to check up on me. I told him I was able to get ahold of my dad and that he was going to take care of things. If I hadn't been able to find help, Tom kindly said he would have offered to drop me off somewhere. Oh how the Lord blesses me with wonderful people in my life!

God was really looking out for me, because my dad had actually arrived home the day before. (I slept at a friend's house that night so I missed his homecoming.) He and my mom were just coming back from dropping a trailer off at my uncle's fiancee, Marlene's, house twenty minutes out of the city I was stranded in. They happened to be passing my area when they picked up the phone and were able to swing by Subway within minutes. Dad checked under the hood while I held an umbrella to protect him from the chilly rain. Whatever we tried didn't work--including a jump.

Dad decided it would be best to go back to my aunt-to-be's house and pick the trailer up again and load my car onto it taking it back to our home forty-five minutes south of the city. I let the Subway employees know we'd be back for the car and I piled into the Suburban with my dad and mom. On our way to get the trailer Mom explained God really was looking out for me. They were actually leaving Marlene's house when she called letting them know she was there and wanted to catch up. They turned around and talked for another half hour before heading in my direction. If Marlene hadn't talked to them for that half hour my parents would have almost been back home. Oh my word, such a close call there!

When we got the trailer I hopped in my car to steer while my incredible father pushed the car from behind onto the trailer. I watched my dad's technique for future reference as he tied it onto the trailer with straps tied with double and triple half-hitches. Once it was secure we gratefully got into the warm Suburban and headed home.

Although I didn't go to the library or Bible study, I felt like I experienced God's protection and love in a way I haven't ever experienced before. It was incredible. :')

Dad looked at my car today and the problem stemmed from the starter. It'll be fixed today so I can still drive to work on Monday! Praise God!

So that's my story for today. ^^ Keep an eye out for the blessings in disguise God sends your way!

Blessings,

~Twyla


The Big, Green House on the End of the Block

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 10:15 AM
This is a bit of an explanation.


We moved.


That's the reason why I haven't posted anything new for a month. I've been too overwhelmed.


Things were out of my control and changing all around me. It was wholly and utterly in God's most capable hands. We found out were were moving on March 1, 2012. The house we had lived in came with my dad's job, and since he was resigning, we were moving back to the house we originally moved from a small town just 40 miles south of our "job house". (We had kept our old house just in case this happened, thank the Lord.)


Rather than going into the details of the move, I'd rather tackle the spiritual lessons I learned through this unique experience.


Initially, I was very opposed to moving. My job, the Bible studies I attended, and my friends were all in that town. But more than that, I desired to stay in that home. Not necessarily the job, but the house. After six previous moves, I was ready to live in that house for much longer...well, at least until I moved away from my parents. ;)


The more time passed, I naturally desired to leave our "job house." The politics of the job were becoming stressful to me. Don't get me wrong, we had many blessings living there for the 6 1/2 years, but I think the Lord was whispering to us, "It's time to go now."


Somewhere along the lines, I rendered all my fears and discomfort about the move to the Lord, and I felt the transition went much smoother.


We were officially moved in over Easter weekend. Now we live, once again, in our big, green house at the end of the block.


I've learned so much through this experience. Giving God the control is so much easier than trying to handle it on you own. A quote that I really like is "Every end is a new beginning." ~Unknown Author. I've also experienced the selflessness, love, and compassion of four families offering their home to me if I need a place to stay while I'm up in the big city. How wonderful the Lord is!


I still maintain my job, Bible studies, and volunteering. I just commute the 40+ miles to go to them. I'm paying twice as much for gas now, so while I work the minimum wage job I've held for the past five years, I am learning to be content with what I have and living frugally. I am so blessed that I can pay for my cell phone, my car insurance, and my parents rent and still have a tiny portion of my paycheck left.


I think the Lord really gives us a lot for a little, but because the world always wants more, many people don't understand that. I'm really having to think of the little things I never noticed before, and it's a blessing. :)


Blessings,


~Twyla















Change is in the Air

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 1:01 AM
I may have mentioned this in an earlier post, but I'm not really a fan of change. Much to my embarrassment, I have a very rigid personality on top of being stubborn. They aren't very pleasant qualities and the Lord knows how to test my obedience by forcing me to open my eyes to the real world.


I have been faced with several unexpected and difficult decisions lately, some of which break my heart. Some of them feel over my head and complicated like college. 


I am in the process of choosing between two schools while comparing prices, driving distance, and course material. Plus, I still need to look up grants. :P It's a rather important and expensive decision, so I'd rather make the right choice for what God wants me to do. (Honestly, if I had it my way, I wouldn't even go to college. I'd save my money and get a house or save up for my own little business someday.) Debt is not something I want to carry.


Anyways~


I was just thinking about the apostles and how much change their personal lives went through when Jesus asked them to follow Him. They abandoned what they were doing and followed Him just like that. They left their homes, their families, their jobs, everything. They trusted Him so deeply and yearned to know the Son of God, the Savior of the earth, that they left their lives behind them in order to create a new life through Jesus. That is so incredible and inspiring to me, but I've always wondered in the farthest corners of my mind whether I would have done the same. In my head I think, "Yeah! Who wouldn't follow Him? He's Jesus, for goodness sakes! Of course I would." But that's in my mind... in my mind I'm really awesome and brave. In reality I'm a coward.


Sometimes I feel like the rich man when Jesus asked him to sell all his things and follow Him--hesitant. I am so comfortable being with my family and pets, my job and co-workers, and my friends. I am a person of habit and planning. Some days I can be spontaneous, but often times I need to plan out what I'm doing during the week. If Jesus asked me right here, right now, "Come, leave your things and follow me?" I don't know if I could do it or not. It makes me feel so guilty and ashamed inside. Granted, it may be different if He was here in human form again, but I never know for sure. Yes, I have given my life to Christ, but I'm still at my physical home and family. 


Just now I've thought of the quote, "Home is where the heart is" and for Christians isn't "home" Jesus? So wouldn't it be more like, "Jesus is my home whom my heart will follow"? So no matter where the Lord takes me in life I would always be home, right? I wonder if that's how the apostles felt...


I think I may have slipped off topic, but those were some of my thoughts recently.


I don't want to sound hypocritical (especially after this post), but I hope that, you the reader, and I will be able to follow Jesus no matter where He calls us. :) He loves us so deeply that He wants to transform us.


Blessings,


~Twyla

It's Out of Control

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 7:16 PM
Are you a control freak? Personally, I admit to being one. When a situation gets out of my control I lose my composure and stress out. I was thinking on this yesterday, and I realized everyone has a little bit of "control freak" in them even if they don't know it.

For example, when I was in Australia with my brother and Grandpa the shower in our lodgings was a little tricky. If you turned the hot water knob, it was cold. If you turned the cold water knob, it was cold. We began to wonder, "Will we only have cold showers for two weeks?" My brother, who has the great gift of thinking outside the box, tinkered around with the shower and sink. He found if you turned the hot water on in the sink and waited for it to get hot, you could turn the hot water on in the shower and it would get hot. Hurray! After my brother, I took my shower. I quickly realized I could either have a scalding hot shower or a freezing cold shower. There was no happy medium.

When I came home and took a shower, my first thought was, "Hey, now I can turn on the water to whatever temperature I want and it stays that way." That's when it hit me.

It was just a shower, yet when I couldn't control the temperature I was dissatisfied. When I could control it I was comfortable and happy. Have you ever thought of the things you like to control in your daily life? I started to. Here's couple I thought of:

Air conditioning/Heating - We keep our house and cars the temperature we like it. Goodness, what I terrible thing when it isn't.

Backseat Driving - Have you ever sat in the backseat or passenger seat and critiqued the driver's driving because it didn't suite you?

What if we lived in a world where we couldn't control anything? Would you be happy or upset? Sometimes I feel like this can be my initial reaction to God when He presents a situation I'm opposed to because it's outside of my control which in turn, is outside of my comfort zone.

He has a plan for my life, and I want in on it. But that would ruin His surprise, His blessings, for me wouldn't it? If we knew God's plan, why would we need to trust Him? I'm learning every day that God cares for my well being and He challenges me to trust in Him. I'm truly thankful. (Though, I admit in the moment it's hard to feel thankful.)

I hope my question to myself also made you think. :)

Blessings,


~Twyla

Reverse Gossip

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 12:06 AM
Reverse gossip is an idea that the Bible study I attend and I want to put into practice more.

We recently finished reading through a Bible study book called, "Speaking Wisely: Exploring the Power of Words" by Poppy Smith. One of the subjects she covered was gossip. We had a great discussion on how to handle it using actual examples supplied by attendees.

It's shameful to confess, but even I have gossiped before. I did today and regret it. When I had the chance to lift someone up, I took the chance to tear them down and make them look bad. That was wrong of me. Although what the person did was wrong, I could have turned the situation away from their faults and complimented their strengths. Hence the idea of reverse gossip or encouragement.

I've been gossiped about at a previous job, and unintentionally overheard it. It wasn't about me so much as it was about my work performance and the lack of productivity due to my inexperience. It was very painful to hear and I went home and sobbed in discouragement to my parents.

No one wants to be gossiped about and no one wants to be known as a gossiper. So why do it? Because we like to be entertained. Negative things happening to another person entertaining to us for some twisted reason.

So my challenge to you (and myself), my kind readers, is to practice reverse gossip this week. Keep at it until it because a habit. Look at the person from different angles, put yourself in their shoes, empathize with them. You'd be surprised how differently you look at things when you give them the benefit of the doubt. ;)

~Twyla

Once Upon a Comfort Fortress...

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 11:19 PM
I will admit: I am a coward. I'm scared of new places, new people, new sounds, and new environments. I'm scared of change because that happens to be outside the comfortable and familiar walls of my comfort fortress.


Sometimes when Change come visits with Opportunity, I fear them. I feel rather rude and ungrateful about it. Here I am getting along quite well in my lovely castle, not really moving forward nor backward, and God sends me these two fine visitors whom I sometimes dread and turn away. Is that a way for me to greet what the Lord has sent me? Two visitors who will help grow me in His ways and build my character? The honest answer, is no. Yet here I sit worrying about it.


Change and Opportunity came by recently and soon I will embark on a quest with my brother and grandpa. I'm scared that my anxiety will flare up or that something will go wrong while we're away--cut off from all access to what I am familiar with. Yet many people have sent me a couple more travel buddies--Prayer and Encouragement. Although I'm still wary, it feels good to have those two walk across my draw-bridge and into the unknown with me as well as the Lord and my family. :)


My prayer is that I will put my trust in God, so that I may be at ease and enjoy the trip to its fullest.


Psalm 56:3, "Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You."


Psalm 73:26, "My flesh and my heart fail; but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."


I just looked those up in my Bible and fine those verses very encouraging to me right now. ^^


~Twyla













Back to the Bible

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 10:38 PM
I try not to base my faith on "feelings", but I know when I don't read my Bible consistently and pray often, I don't "feel" close to God. It's like my faith becomes stale and I "feel" like I'm not going anywhere.

When it gets to be like that, I feel depressed. Nothing too serious, but a deep sadness as if a boulder weighs my heart down. I had one of those days yesterday. I didn't really know what to do with myself, but a part of my soul starved for the Word, and I obliged it.

I opened in prayer and expressed my feelings as well as I could to the Lord. I knew that whatever I couldn't voice, He knew.

Then I cracked open my Bible and read 11 chapters in John. It felt great to get back to my Bible. I've read through John before, but when I was reading it last night it felt like the first time all over again.

Something I made for my Tumblr account last night after my God-time.

When I finished reading my heart felt a little lighter. As the evening progressed I  noticed that the boulder from before had been relieved from me, and I felt incredible peace.

When I "feel" I am reassured and my faith is renewed. So while I try not to base my faith on "feeling" I do believe it helps refresh me. :)

Blessings,

~Twyla

A New Chapter

Published by Twyla E. Brooks under on 8:51 PM
I am pleased to announce my return to blogging!

It's been quite a journey getting here after my hectic lifestyle for the past few months. Thankfully things are becoming more manageable.

For the past two years, I cried on New Years as soon as the clock struck midnight. For me, I felt loss as the previous year. It seemed to slip through my fingers like the ribbon of a balloon, drifting higher and higher until it was impossible to retrieve. I grasped tightly to my dreams, my friends, my memories, and the final years of my adolescence.

But this past year, I celebrated. I surrounded myself with people who shared the same love in God as I do. I eagerly awaited the moment when I could pull the string to my popper and release the coils of confetti within it. I brought in 2012 with a smile on my face and laughter bubbling out of me.

A small part of me was sad to let 2011 go, but years are meant to pass, meant for us to let go, meant for us to move forward. That's the attitude I held this time. My high school senior year was overwhelming and full of time-consuming projects filled with stress. I felt like a honey bee trying to endlessly keep up with the work ahead of me, but it was also filled with accomplishment, many new learning experiences, and astonishing discoveries.

This year, I pray that I can willingly follow the steps the Lord has set before me. I want to see what amazing and beautiful things He will show me, what struggles I will endure to grow closer to Him, and how my faith will grow.

I may not be comfortable with everything I will endure or come to, but I'll take it as another new learning experience--an adventure in my faith, and hopefully I will always remember that God has big plans for me and my future. (I just need to make sure I'm patient enough to wait for it.) ;)

I hope everyone's New Year is filled with discovery!

Blessings,

~Twyla
 

Proverbs 16:9

"In his heart man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."

Followers